My inner critic!
Hey guys, I know I’ve not been online for a while. For those of you who know me, you’re probably thinking, and yep, you’re right, it’s because I feel a bit uncomfortable doing stuff like this. But I’ve had a couple of clients and friends remind me that I need to be seen, that potential clients want to get to know me, and that my past clients still like to keep in touch through social media.
So, you’re probably wondering, why does Lesley feel weird about posting? Well, I’ll tell you - it’s because I don’t feel good enough. Yep, I said it.
How do I stop feeling not good enough online? Well, honestly, it’s mainly a lot of self-criticism and thinking everyone else does it better than me. Where does that come from? Probably deep inside I feel insecure. I’ve never had anyone tell me my posts are rubbish or don’t like what I share.
That’s something I want to work on. It’s way easier to do that with a client than with myself. Why? Because during my training to become a counsellor, I worked really hard on my self-worth and I’ve come a long way - I like myself a lot more now. But when it comes to social media, that insecurity still sneaks back in sometimes, usually without me noticing. That’s when I have to remind myself to go back to basics. Change my beliefs, stop acting based on that negative mindset.
A belief is something I’ve probably been told or convinced of a long time ago, but it’s not true. So, I can change it. I can change how I talk to myself, stop listening to that inner critic, and instead of having a negative chat in my head, I try to pause, reflect, and figure out what’s really going on. What’s triggered me? How can I speak more kindly to myself? I can start by being gentler, softer, more calm. Celebrate what I do well.
I know that sometimes this probably feels fake, and the negative thoughts can quickly take over again. But I need to push through until I start truly believing in myself.
I also tell others to journal. Sometimes you can see those negative thoughts creeping back when you write them down. It’s a good way to spot them and reframe them in a more positive way. Once you bring them into awareness, you can work on changing them. For example, I remind myself that people don’t have to follow me or listen to me if they don’t want to. If they don’t agree, does it even matter?
Anyway, I’ll finish it up here. I took advice from a fellow counsellor I really admire on social media - she said don’t waste time re-watching the reel, just post it. So, here goes!
Oh, also, I’ll put this in a blog and post it on my website. The link is in the comments below, just in case you want to read.
Have a great afternoon!
19th July 2025